Wednesday, February 23, 2011


The frog is rocking his well, thinking it is rocking the world.

I posted this line on Twitter sometime back and it got me thinking. Who is this frog I keep alluding to in my thoughts whenever I come across a reincarnation of this frog as a human?

I remember reading this story in a book that had speeches and works by Swami Vivekananda. Yeah, I got all those books when I had been for a camp in the Swami Vivekananda center. Point is, this frog story has stayed with me for long. It is the simplicity of the story and the fact that you see it so often in the world around you that brings it closer to reality than most other stories.

The frog who thinks that his well is the entire universe. The frog who thinks that there is so much in this well of his that it is the best thing ever. The frog who is proud and looks down upon the other mighty sea folks who have explored the unknown ocean.

The little frog who is the king of his own world.

But would you blame the frog for that? This Chinese story ends with the frog realizing how little the well is as compared the ocean. It is mildly shocked and is upset.

Does this happen in reality? Humans are more likely to turn to their own well and be the Lord Frog of that splendid well. My well is bigger than yours. My well is shinier, damper and filled with delicious edible creatures.

Humans are also more likely to realize that their well is not the world and keep complaining about it. Yeah that is possible too. Do you know how tough it is to maintain my well? I have to do tons of things to keep it a good place. What about you big shelled turtle, the seasons take care of your uncontrollable ocean. What would you know!

I really don’t know what side should I take when I want to allude to the frog now. Maybe both, maybe some other dimension would come up.

I wish at times that I was Sigmund Freud.

Monday, February 21, 2011

Who Am I?

Demetri Martin tries to answer the question Who Am I? in The New Yorker.

One of the best posts I have read in recent times. Here is an excerpt that refers to:

Batman -

I am Batman, but only on Halloween. And then I am not invited to many parties. But I am fine with that, because that just makes me an even more accurate Batman (because Batman does not go to parties as Batman but only as Bruce Wayne). I am right about this.

One of my favourite song by The Beatles -

I am the Walrus, but not the one you’re probably thinking of. I am the Other Walrus, the one who is less the Walrus in the sense of legendary music and more the Walrus in the sense of his tendency to lie around on a beach for too long.

Go read!

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

A decade on...

Adi had a tough day at school. Being a 10 year old is not easy. All that grammar that schools keep piling up. Transitive verbs, Intransitive verbs, Infinitives, Gerunds... it is never too easy for a kid who is continuously thinking of the upcoming episode of Black Butler on Animax.

Like most of the other 10 year old kids, he was just growing up. The hard way.

Adi bangs the door after ringing the bell twice. He was furious for being kept outside the door for so long. Normally his mother didn't take so much time to open the door.

"Give me a minute," came gruff shout from behind the door and suddenly his Dad opened the door.
"Adi, you need to learn to be patient boy. This haste will lead you nowhere!"
"Hmph! How come you came home early dad and where is Mom?"
"Well, your mother has an office party to attend this evening so both of us are bachelors out here!"
"Dad, but I am hungry. Can you give me some food?"
"Sure you hungry little pig, there is some rice left over from yesterday, I will just heat it up for you."

Dad heats up the rice and keeps the plate ready on the table while Adi washes himself and comes to eat. He notices a glass in Dad's hand with some dark brown fluid.

"Dad, why do you keep drinking that gross smelling, ugly tasting fluid?"

Dad smiles. One of his tipsy naughty smiles.

"At my age, even you would know!"
"Eeks, stop with your usual heavy stuff Dad!"
"Say hello to the real word, boy!"
"Stop trying to eat and eat, boy!"
"DAAAD," Adi shouts. "Will you please stop all that and give me a spoon?"
"That's impossible. Instead only try to realize the truth."
"What truth Dad?"
"That there is no spoon."


Couldn't help it! Been a decade since the movie was released and still we are so much influenced. This is a dedication of some sorts.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Four Horsemen

Just this morning, everyone on my Twitter time line started listening to Metallica. What an influence they have been, and will always be.

I am just listing down some of my favourite Metallica tracks, apart from the anthems. Nothing more.

Album: Kill 'Em All
  • Seek & Destroy
Album: Ride the Lightning
  • Fight Fire with Fire
  • For Whom The Bell Tolls
Album: Master of Puppets
  • Disposable Heroes
  • The Thing That Should Not Be
  • Leper Messiah
  • Damage Inc.
Album: ...And Justice for All
  • Blackened
  • Eye of The Beholder
  • The Shortest Straw
  • Harvester of Sorrow
  • To Live Is to Die
  • Dyers Eve
Album: Metallica
  • My Friend of Misery
Album: Load
  • The House Jack Built
  • Bleeding Me
  • King Nothing
  • Thorn Within
  • The Outlaw Torn
Album: ReLoad
  • Bad Seed
  • Where The Wild Things Are
  • Fixxxer
Album: St. Anger
  • Sweet Amber
Album: Death Magnetic
  • Suicide & Redemption
  • Cyanide
  • All Nightmare Long
  • Broken, Beat & Scarred
Clearly ...And Justice is probably my favourite album. I remember buying this cassette using the deposit money I got back from college, without telling parents! What a prized possession that has been.


Friday, February 11, 2011


All around we see people who want to be the centre of attraction in a crowd. We see folks who 'have to' have attention of everyone they are sitting with. To meet this objective, they act funnier that needed, go on a I-will-mock-others-unnecessarily trip, consistently pick on someone or just try to gather sympathy or pity.

That and a lot other things. The 'I' is very pronounced even when they are sitting in a group. You don't have to start every sentence with an 'I'. 'I' is within and without. Everyone has to cater to that one 'I'.

And then there are some who love solitude. Less but right participation in groups. Fun loving people. Who just watch the court being jested by the 'I'. They more often than not smile. Smile within and without.

And there is Mr. Charles Bukowski who wrote this:
"I've never been lonely. I've been in a room - I've felt suicidal. I've been depressed. I've felt awful - awful beyond all - but I never felt that one other person could enter that room and cure what was bothering me... or that any number of people could enter that room. In other words, loneliness is something I've never been bothered with because I've always had this terrible itch for solitude. It's being at a party, or at a stadium full of people cheering for something, that I might feel loneliness. I'll quote Ibsen, "The strongest men are the most alone." I've never thought, "Well, some beautiful blonde will come in here and give me a fuck-job, rub my balls, and I'll feel good." No, that won't help. You know the typical crowd, "Wow, it's Friday night, what are you going to do? Just sit there?" Well, yeah. Because there's nothing out there. It's stupidity. Stupid people mingling with stupid people. Let them stupidify themselves. I've never been bothered with the need to rush out into the night. I hid in bars, because I didn't want to hide in factories. That's all. Sorry for all the millions, but I've never been lonely. I like myself. I'm the best form of entertainment I have. Let's drink more wine!"


Tuesday, February 8, 2011

I am Jack's ear that hears the familiar tiger roar

We all read and like Calvin and Hobbes. Some of us absolutely love these amazing characters by Bill Watterson.

Some of us love Fight Club too.

I am Jack's eye that stares at the eye of the tiger...

Would you ever think that there could be a connection between these two?

Read this article: "I Am Jack's Younger Self"

There is still so much to fathom, isn't there?

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Lane of memories :: The conclusion

With an angry screech, the car halted near the construction site. A man vehemently got out of the driver’s seat and started walking towards the person who seemed to be in charge at the construction site.

“Tell your people to stop the work.”

“But we have orders from the owner of this place. This whole area and the small lane has to be flattened for a mall.”

“Thanks for the details, but I own this place now and that gives me the orders to stop the work. Here is a copy of the land deal. For details, let me put you through to my lawyer.”

After the hurried phone call, the construction in charge gives a confused glance at the papers. He then looks at the man in front of him. The eyes that don’t speak but just stare.

“Is that evidence enough?” the man says.

The in charge yells at the people to stop the work.

The man stands there, looks at everyone in the field. Eye to Eye. Passing a message that seems to say, I am the owner now. Cold hard look.

He waits for a long time while the construction people pack off their stuff and start leaving the place. Meanwhile his second in command also reaches the place and talks with the construction in charge. Clarifies whatever little persisting doubt.

“New owner. New ideas. You are wasting your time. Please tell your people to wrap up soon and leave.”


Mandrake sits in his chair looking out of the balcony. A glass of whiskey and soda sits besides him. Whiskey on the rocks was never his type of drink. Whichever whiskey it was, it was always with soda.

He takes a peaceful sip and reflects on the day. It was a conclusion to the deal that he fought for almost a month, a hard fought month.

He had to be secretive about being the main person interested in the land deal. Very secretive. Under no circumstances he could allow his name to be revealed to the old owner.

He had a lot of poignant feelings attached to that piece land.

Specially the lane that went through the land. That little lane just besides the main road. The little lane that was lined by a few trees. A few nests that housed birds who added melody to the memories.

Mandrake just couldn’t allow Mehnaz to destroy this lane of memories. Memories they shared together.

More to come

Friday, February 4, 2011

Fight Club

I don't know if I will ever go on an acid trip. But if I do, I believe it will be an exaggerated and a very personal version of the feeling that I got while reading the Fight Club.


"I know this because Tyler knows this."

Like a lot of people out there in the world, I have seen the movie first, loved it and then seen it a couple of times more. One of the best movies ever made.

Then comes the book.

Ever imagine what would happen if you were to be asphyxiated to the point when you cannot take it any more, you fight for oxygen and are then dropped in a pool of water? The mad rush of water through the empty vacuum that was reserved for air?

Probably a similar experience while reading the book. Probably.

This was freedom. Losing all hope was freedom.

The narration is beautiful, mind-blowing and gloriously insane.

You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everyone else, and we are all part of the same compost pile.

One will wonder what this book is all about. But then there are so many things that are there, just because they are there. No Questions asked and Answers, if any, lie hidden.

"If you don't know what you want," the doorman said, "you end up with a lot you don't."

Why 'Fight Club'?

After a night in fight club, everything in the real world gets the volume turned down. Nothing can piss you off. Your word is law, and if other people break that law or question you, even that doesn't piss you off.

What's the point?

Maybe self-improvement isn't the answer.... Maybe self-destruction is the answer.

That makes these men manly?

The gyms you go to are crowded with guys trying to look like men, as if being a man means looking the way a sculptor or an art director says.

But in the end:

Nothing was solved when the fight was over, but nothing mattered.

Brilliant. Just brilliant!

(The lines in italic are by Chuck Palahniuk from the book Fight Club.)

Thursday, February 3, 2011

In a fish bowl...

This photo reminded me of the eternally beautiful song by Pink Floyd:

...We're just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl
Year after year

Running over the same old ground

What have we found?

The same old fears

Wish you were here...

Image courtesy: -Fearless-

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Just tripping

"A love like that was a serious illness, an illness from which you never entirely recover."
— (The People Look Like Flowers At Last: New Poems)

"The shortest distance between two points is often unbearable."

"It was like the beginning of life and laughter. It was the real meaning of the sun"
— (Factotum)

" that drunken place
you would
like to hand your heart to her
and say
touch it
but then
give it back."
— (The People Look Like Flowers At Last: New Poems)

"Some lose all mind and become soul,insane.
some lose all soul and become mind, intellectual.
some lose both and become accepted"

All quotes by the genius Charles Bukowski.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Old Computer

I have this old computer bought sometime in 2002-03. Intel Celeron 950 Mhz processor with 128 MB RAM and a 40 GB drive. What a time that was! I was hooked on games like Half Life, Max Payne and Age of Empires. For hours together I used to sit and play and play. Food and Life were almost forgotten.

Then there was a minor incident during the monsoons when a current entered the Internet hub and passed on to the LAN card. Boom. I have seen fumes coming out of my CPU. That was the time when the motherboard got busted and the 40 GB drive turned into a read-only disk! Had to go through the usual rounds to find a similar motherboard (lack of funds to buy a new latest one was due to my habit of playing games throughout the day, you know how it is!) and fix the computer. Since I was keen on buying a new disk, a swanky new 80 GB one, I wanted some more time to gather enough funds. Then I borrowed a 4 GB disk from some one (I forgot) and used it for a month or so! 4 GB! (I still have that disk!)

So money was collected, new disk was bought and fitted and then it was back to game play! But alas, time and technology had paced so much that none of the new games would work on my old faithful computer. I tried playing GTA, but then at times the entire game went in to bullet time (Max Payne terminology) on its own and everything moved rather slowly. It did try my patience. A lot at that!

Now time has come to sell this long forgotten box since the space it occupied for a long time (it sat unused for almost 3 years now) is required for something else. Maybe my already 2 year old laptop will occupy that little space. And as to how much money I will get for the old 'dabba', as everyone prefers to call it, I am sure not more than 500 Rs. (I hope I get more though!)

Technology. It has surely traveled faster than time and continues to do so.